Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Whirlwind.

Lately, my mind has been in a whirlwind of emotions. Fluctuations of past feelings; not the actual feeling themselves, but more or less memories of the broken path I was on, and how I go to where I am now emotionally. It's as if I had forgotten my past somewhat. I've been living in a world without memories for a while and now, a year later, something reminds me of all of the emotional experiences I've had. Maybe it was the leaves. Maybe the season. Maybe it's just normal. Everything comes back to me. It hurts sometimes. I keep it to myself. I can feel the frame of what I used to feel. I had so much in front of me. So many different roads to tumble and fall deeply down. Now, my tied-up tongue is clumsy; holding me down for seems like a century. I wish I could have thought things a little more through. Maybe things would be different. Giving what's real to people hasn't been any harder.

One day, I'd like to write a song. In that song, I could make and verse of words my own. My own free feelings. My own free thoughts and outspoken gestures in the form of poetry. Until that day comes, I will be here, waiting for it all to come together.

4 comments:

  1. love it! a song!!! thats exciting :)

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  2. and it will form. its good youre allowing time for it to happen. i cant wait to read it. i know it will be amazing and something i will want to sing. lol. or to hear you sing it would be lovely.lol. your voice of angels. bahaha. have fun. youll get it right.
    iloveyou

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  3. "living in a world without memories for a while"
    I wish I could live like that.
    i was just telling Rachel how I hate looking back on the past.
    Your writing always makes me want to one up you. Which I know is impossible. Because we're both our own free mind, not connected in any way. So our writings will always be different and inspiring in their own ways. But I'm jelous of your writings. I seem to be stuck. But I'll get there soon enough.
    Good job.

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  4. Mann everything you say/write is just AMMAZING!!!

    ILY.
    p.s. ive been goin thru a little of the same thing... cold weather always brings gloomy thoughts 2 mind...

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